Books on Domestic Violence

Recommended Reading

This list of books, which can be found at your local library, can help victims, their families, and friends with resources to support themselves and one another through difficult situations.

Guides to Assessing Your Situation
Ending the Cycle of Violence
Non-Physical Abuse
Ending Myths about Women and Domestic Violence
Teenagers and Abusive Relationships

Helping Professions: How can you help stop Domestic Violence?
Faith and Domestic Violence
Racial Issues and Abuse
Personal Stories of Abuse
Animal Abuse/Cruelty and the Link to Domestic Violence

For Additional Resources and Books on Sexual Assault/Abuse go to the Maryland Coalition Against Sexual Assualt. The Maryland Coalition Against Sexual Assault, Inc. is a nonprofit organization founded in 1982 to address the needs of victims of sexual crimes throughout the State.

Resource Directory / Bibliography

Guides to Assessing Your Situation

When Men Batter Women: New Insights Into Ending Abusive Relationships
Neil S. Jacobson; John Gottman, Copyright–March, 1998

This book is based on research of actual cases from a ten-year 200 couple case study. Authors distinguish myths from facts, such as all batterers are alike. Here, batterers are described as having two distinctive personalities–cobras and pit bulls. The cobras have been engaged in anti-social behavior since adolescence and appear to have criminal mentalities. The pit bull, on the other hand is more likely to confine his violence to his wife. The book discusses these types of behavior and discusses distinctions between the two.

This book helps victims to identify different aspects of domestic violence and supplies victims with tools to help analyze their individual situation.

Men Who Hate Women and Women Who Love Them
Susan Forward, Copyright–June, 1987

The author of this book uses case histories, mostly of men who abuse women, to help women understand the pattern of the batterer’s destructive behavior, how to break the pattern, heal and gain self respect. It describes how batterers use their negative childhood experience toward their spouses or partners. The book is useful for women to try to understand why the batterer acts the way he does. Some questions asked in the book that help women recognize abuse are: Is he extremely jealous or possessive? Does he belittle your opinions, feelings or your accomplishments? Does he blame you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship? If these behaviors are familiar, it reveals that the man is one who may love you, but causes pain because he acts as if he hates you.

Ending the Cycle of Violence

Defending Our Lives – Getting Away from Domestic Violence and Staying Safe
Susan Murphy-Milano, Copyright–October, 1996

This book is a very helpful tool that provides women with strategies to protect themselves from domestic violence. It provides detailed, step-by-step information and describes what steps need to be taken in order to ensure a safe departure from the abuser (phone numbers to have available, financial records, medical records, social security cards for wife and children). It also describes exactly what domestic violence is and how to get the police to help. Chapters included in the book are: Recognizing Domestic Violence; Calling Police; Making Decision to Leave; Escape Plan; Staying Safe; Using Stalking Laws.

Book also has list of organizations and phone numbers in the appendices. Click here to learn about organizations near you that can help.

Battered Women – Living with the Enemy
Ana Kosof, Copyright–November, 1994

This book recognizes domestic violence as an epidemic and reveals the harsh reality that 50% of all women killed in the U.S. are killed by their male partner and there are still thousands of cases that go unreported. Author also addresses the fact that it is difficult to have domestic violence treated as a crime. Actual cases describe the cycle of domestic violence, why women stay, and how domestic violence can be avoided. She also discusses the legal aspects of domestic violence, the types of men who batter women, shelters available, and even women who kill their abusers. The book encourages women to end abusive relationships before they begin and describes some early signs of violent behavior. One of the main purposes of this book is to attempt to answer the age-old question, “Why Doesn’t She Just Leave?”

Non-Physical Abuse

The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond
Patricia Evans, Copyright–March, 1996

This book is helpful to women who are trapped in verbally abusive relationships. One myth surrounding verbally abusive relationships is that they are not as detrimental as physically abusive relationships. This book addresses the damaging effects of verbal abuse on children and family. It asks questions that will help women recognize the symptoms of verbal abuse. This book will help women understand that what they are feeling is real and “not all in their head”. It will also explain that verbal abuse does not have to be outright-it can be very subtle. Evans describes different kinds of abuse and discusses the abuser’s behavior. This book will allow women to gain “personal power” as they cope with this issue.

The authors also discuss the extremely dangerous situation potentially created when battered women leave relationships. This discussion includes a questionnaire that helps access the seriousness of the abusive situation. The authors makes suggestions to develop a safety plan. You can develop your own safety plan right now. Other topics covered in this book include: When Does the Abuse Stop; Rehabilitating Batterers; When You’re Ready to Leave; Ending Domestic Violence Against Women.

Violent Voices: Twelve Steps to Freedom from Emotional Abuse
Kay Porterfield, Copyright–October, 1989

The author explains the effects of being in an emotionally abusive relationship. Through discussions and exercises based on the 12-step program, she helps emotionally abused women delve into their childhood, build self-esteem and deal effectively with the abuse.

No Visible Wounds: Identifying Nonphysical Abuse of Women By Their Men
Mary Susan Miller, Copyright, October, 1996

“No Visible Wounds” focuses on emotional abuse. The snide comments and put-downs that appear harmless are not. This book focuses on the subtle, yet powerful forms of abuse that has been overlooked and overshadowed by physical abuse.

Ending Myths about Women and Domestic Violence

Battered Women
Lenore Walker, Copyright–April, 1980

Battered Women is another insightful book that depicts the myths and realities of domestic violence. Real life stories provide victims with the comfort of knowing that they are not alone in their struggle against domestic violence.

Next Time She’ll Be Dead: Battering and How to Stop It
Ann Jones, Copyright-December, 1994

This book also addresses the question: “Why doesn’t she just leave?” It is directed toward anyone who believes that women stay in abusive relationships because they like it, or deserve it and women who thought it could never happen to them. It looks at battered women, abusive men, and society’s response to them.

Teens and Abusive Relationships

In Love and in Danger: A Teen’s Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships
Barrie Levy, Copyright–February, 1998

The number of teens involved in abusive relationships is phenomenal. This book tells the personal stories of three young women caught in the trap of an abusive relationship. It helps teens identify whether or not their young relationships are abusive and how to escape before it is too late. It also depicts a mother’s view of her daughter’s relationship.

Helping Professions: How Can You Stop Domestic Violence?

Battered Wives
Del Martin, Copyright–October, 1989

This book is geared to helping those in the legal system (police, prosecutors) and others who have the power to help enforce domestic violence laws. He touches on the attitudes toward women and the lack of support from the legal and social service systems. The author proposes legislation that prohibits spousal abuse and suggests that judges protect women by denying probation and de-emphasizing reconciliation. Other concerns are gun control and equal rights.

Racial Issues and Abuse

Chain Chain Change: For Black Women in Abusive Relationships
Evelyn White, Copyright–February, 1995

This book is written specifically for African-American women in physically or emotionally abusive relationships. It provides useful information in trying to break the abusive cycle. One of the issues it touches on is how the racism that blacks face contribute to domestic violence. Feelings of uselessness or powerlessness caused by racism can lead some black men to violence. This book also reiterates to women that the abuse is not their fault and it should not be tolerated.

Personal Stories of Abuse

I Closed My Eyes: Revelations of a Battered Woman
Michele Weldon, Copyright–September, 1999

I Closed My Eyes tells of a woman who appears to be living a perfect life, with a so-called loving husband and a picture-perfect marriage. This is the author’s personal story of the abuse she endured and it drives home the point that abuse is not culturally biased–it can affect everyone. Her story is similar to those of thousands of women who did not believe that abuse could occur in their “perfect” households.

Animal Abuse/Cruelty and the Link to Domestic Violence

Cruelty to Animals and Interpersonal Violence: Readings in Research and Application

Edited by Randall Lockwood and Frank Ascione, Purdue University Press

Cruelty to animals is often a sign of a future of destructive interpersonal relationships. Research on this topic is providing new insights into the nature of violence. This book provides students, scholars, professions, and interested lay readers a comprehensive source to gain a complete picture of the varied issues and their implications.

Child Abuse, Domestic Violence, and Animal Abuse: Linking the Circles of Compassion for Prevention and Intervention

Edited by Frank Ascione and Phil Arkow, Purdue University Press

Evidence is mounting that animal abuse, frequently embedded in families scarred by domestic violence and child abuse and neglect, often predicts the potential for other violent acts. This book encourages researchers and professionals to recognize that animal abuse, while a problem in its own right, may also indicate a potential for domestic abuse. This book is a historic step in helping professionals, as well as the general public, recognize the cyclical nature of family violence. This book includes prevention and intervention strategies with an ultimate goal of reducing the levels of violence in society today.

Beyond Violence: The Human Animal Connection (Video)

Psychologists for the Ethical Treatment of Animals

This 13-minute video explores humanity’s connection to other animals. This video is designed for parents, educators, mental health and law enforcement professionals, social workers, and religious leaders. This video depicts the well-established connection between violence against human beings and against other animals.